start.

A year from now you will wish you had started today.

Think about it.

If I could go back one year, I would. That’s not to say that I regret anything huge that would make my life now any different, that’s not it. I just… miss it, for one thing. But there are just so many “ifs” of life, so many distinct directions there are for one to travel.

“I am an extremely indecisive person.” So many people say this, thinking they’re coming to a huge realization about themselves. I hate to break it to you, but have you ever met someone that calls him or herself “decisive?” Well... no you haven’t. Nobody knows exactly what they want, instantly, always.

I think a part of this is because people will always want the best of both worlds. You are only allowed one route in life, so when you make a final decision, you’re saying goodbye to any other path you could have taken.

What if I was still at Iowa State? What if I would have done track in 11^th grade? What if my parents would have let me go to Apple Valley High School? What if I would have pursued that one crush I had? What if I had chosen to live in Cali this summer? What if I had been a better sister?

My what ifs aren’t necessarily things that I would go back and do differently, they’re just different options. I mean, I am extremely happy that my parents forced me into Eastview High School. I HATED it freshman year- my entire group of friends, the closest group I had ever had, went to AV and I was stuck walking into a school where I really didn’t have a group at all. Seriously, think about that. At the end of it all, though, I’m glad I wasn’t allowed to make the choice myself.

Right Now could mean so many different things. There’s a theory out there that time doesn’t actually exist in the form of a line, like we picture it, but rather in the form of space. No particular direction, just different layers of experiences.

I don’t get it, either. But what I do know, is that at this exact instant that I am typing this, I could be at this Eagan dude’s bonfire that I’ve never met, I could be sitting around a fire next to the Pacific Ocean, I could be a recruited college athlete, I could have a better relationship with my brother Matthew, I could have 2 less friends, I could be dead, I could be a ballerina. There are just so many courses one can take in life, there’s no saying where you’ll end up, based on the small decisions you make.

Anyway, all I’m saying is that if you wish you had the chance to change something from a year ago, or 5 years ago, or yesterday… Just think about what you’ll be wanting to change a year from now, or 5, or tomorrow.

Take some chances, yo.

A year from now, you’re not going to care about that awkward moment walking into a bonfire of people you didn’t know. You’ll care about the random encounter with a stranger that led to a new friendship.

A year from now, you won’t care about the stress of attempting again and again to make amends with old friends, you’ll care about the fact that you can finally call them friends again.

A year from now, you will either be exactly where you were with someone, or proud of yourself for moving on, leading to bigger and so much better.

A year from now, the small stuff won’t matter. The product of all the chances you decided to take, will.

A year from now, you will wish you had started today.